First of all: Don’t get me wrong–I have a lot of nerdy friends and family. I consider myself to be slightly nerdy–I have been to the new Star Wars film, watched LORT many of times and read enjoy a good sci-fi novel. So I mean the nickname lovingly. I’m not opposed at all to nerds, but I’m not an uber-nerd. I don’t play video games, do cosplay, come up with fan theories, or have any memorabilia. Though I do have a crazy cat lady action figure…..
Anyways, I started talking to the Nerd because he seemed down to earth and was interested in ballroom dancing. I have fallen so in love with my dance fitness class at the gym that I will reschedule conference calls so that I don’t miss it. (I have an “appointment” at that time. Can do earlier or later?) So, I thought we might have enough in common.
It became clear to me early in the conversation that he was, in fact, quite nerdy. He apparently spends a lot of his free time building tiny models of the Star Trek ships. (I’m sure they are very specific versions of Star Trek ships, but that’s all I got). Interesting… everyone needs a hobby… He wasn’t a huge fan of the new Star Wars movie because it doesn’t follow the stories in the 50 Star Wars books that he has read. To that point in my life, I had no idea there were Star Wars books.
When we got around to discussing first dates, he said he wanted to do something active because he prefers to have fun instead of sitting and talking over a meal. I usually prefer a short first date (to make sure I can spend more than an hour with the guy before committing to spend more than an hour with said guy), but hey, that seemed refreshing and different, so sure! He suggested ice skating. I have never ice skated, so I was kinda terrified actually. But, I was confident that I could look just about this lovable while trying to skate:
Source: Imgur
Anyways, I agree and show up at the appointed time and immediately notice the skating rink is packed full of small children. I do not want to grievously harm children and the Nerd agrees that it isn’t a good idea. We walk around a bit and decide to just have a few drinks and apps. Everything is going pretty good… he is nice and we’re having a decent conversation. Then we have a beer and he starts talking… more… and more… and more….. The stories could be a minute long, but they are 6-7 minutes long. I go to the bathroom…. several times to get a break.
Then he takes out his phone to show me a video of his dancing. Ok, cool, less talking and it will be neat to see, I think, not realizing this will lead to his downfall. In search of the video, he gets side tracked…. on a picture of his Halloween costume… Ok, I think this will be quick. I mean it’s a Halloween costume. He then begins to show and describe the process of painting the sword he used for his Halloween costume. I’m not sure how it’s humanly possibly, but this story was approximately 15 years long and apparently required 3-4 pictures of the progress to properly describe the project.
It was a black sword painted grey. That is the appropriate length of the story, just in case you’re curious.
I go to the bathroom again as a way to end the conversation, but also in the hopes that while I’m away, he won’t be talking so he’ll finish his beer so we can leave.
Doesn’t work. He didn’t drink much beer and he is still looking at pictures of the damn sword….. more pictures of the Halloween costume… more pictures of painting the sword. Uh huh..yea… uh huh…. yea… that’s what you said before yea… uh huh… yea… oh wow… uh huh…. yea that’s grey… on black .. yea i see it….uh huh….
That GIF isn’t relevant to the story in the slightest, but I thought you might be getting as bored as I was at this point and, if so, you could use the something to revive your soul.
Before I died, we manage to leave and I talk my way out of ice skating… too cold, etc… rain check… blah blah.
On the drive home, I decided that I would give him one more date… maybe it was the two beers… maybe he was nervous… he seems nice.
So there will be a Part 2… it’s in an hour… update over the weekend.